It's been a while.
Aston Villa last scored a goal on September 13, meaning they have not scored for five matches. That is not good.
And in that time, a lot of things have happened.
- Watford and Leeds have combined to have five managers.
- Asamoah Gyan held a press conference to deny that he killed a rapper who had gone missing as part of a human sacrifice.
- Thousands of puppies were born.
- You told your friends how much you hated Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off" while humming it.
- Erik Lamela scored the a 20-yard rabona, which was previously thought impossible. Probably.
- Two men hopped the White House fence and ran across the lawn, the second of whom was caught by dogs.
- Good dogs.
- A club started growing their grass using marijuana lamps.
- Apple reminded everyone that U2 exists by forcibly putting their album on your iPhone.
- Faustino Asprilla started a flavored condom line and taught us all that guava is "very good for romancing."
- Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea made an entire song and video dedicated to their behinds.
- Lionel Messi scored the 400th goal of his career (and then more).
- Uncle Rico became an NFL quarterback.
- Uncle Rico died.
- An Arsene Wenger cake tried to eat you.
- Run the Jewels 2 dropped.
- Lots of people ate lots of pie that you could have eaten but didn't.
- Goalkeepers started peeing next to their goal.
- Honey Boo Boo was canceled.
- Scotland chose not to become an independent country.
- DeAndre Yedlin broke the sound barrier.
- You read 22 randomly selected things that have happened in the last 45 days and really need to get a hobby.
from SBNation.com - All Posts http://ift.tt/1swxyjQ
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